WHEN it comes to receiving feedback, I disagree with many of my colleagues in the coaching world.

I know. Shocking, isn’t it? Fancy me having a difference of opinion. ????

Many of my peers proudly puff out their chests and proclaim: “There’s no such thing as bad feedback – there’s just feedback.”

Well, yes, sort of.

BadFeedbackTTIF you have a thick enough skin and IF you’re wise enough to take the teaching in any situation, even negative feedback *can* produce beautiful life lessons.


Particularly if you’re just starting out in business, it can be really easy to take every comment and criticism to heart, and it can be really easy to allow comments from others to knock you off track, so here are my rules when it comes to accepting feedback:

1) Have you requested the feedback? Have you been given the chance to decline if it’s been offered? If someone’s just decided to thrust their opinion at you, that’s just plain rude.

2) Is the person providing feedback qualified to do so? If not, be prepared to take it with a pinch of salt.

3) Is it valid, useful feedback, or purely a subjective opinion? Ie: if someone’s commenting on your brand, explaining that they find your font difficult to read may be valid and useful, whereas telling you they don’t like your colours is simply opinion. You are not a pizza – you can’t please everyone.


Yes, feedback is very often useful and it’s rarely a good idea to shy away from it – in fact, I’d encourage you to seek it out. BUT… if it’s being forced upon you by someone not entirely qualified to comment, or even someone with an agenda, feel free to disregard it.

Eventually you’ll need to learn to toughen up and take it all on the chin, and you’ll know yourself and your business well enough to not be thrown by the doubters and haters. Until that time, you are under no obligation to soak up every bit of feedback you’re offered – be discerning enough to learn from the valid points and bin the rest, and be brave enough to recognise the difference. Just beware falling into the trap of avoiding potentially useful feedback because it makes you squirm a bit… do a reality check before throwing the baby out with the bath water.

That said… standing in your power and saying ‘NO’ can be far more useful than being a negative feedback doormat!